Dancing with ?!!!! Being Faithful to your spouse!

The picture above is me and my husband on our wedding day almost 15 years ago!  Yay God!  I know that this blog is about our journey through the 5 love languages for one year but today I'd like to digress just a touch.

Let's talk about being faithful to your spouse.  You can't speak their love language if you aren't being faithful to them.  This morning I woke to a facebook question posed by The Today Show is reference to Dancing with the Stars and Candace Cameron Bure standing up for Jesus.  It read:  "Is it ok to dance sexy with somebody other than your spouse?"  My response:  Absolutely not!  But what they are trying to do is trip Candace up about her faith and I think it's very wrong of them.  Follow me...I'm going somewhere with this.

Seriously, if you are out dancing with somebody else, reading magazines that promote promiscuity or adultery you are practically cheating on your spouse. We need to make a congizant effort to watch what we read. DO NOT READ "50 Shades of Grey" that talks about having a tryst with another person.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I urge you to be faithful to your spouses in not only your mind, your physical body but in what you read, listen to, etc. We are called to be different!  If you want to speak their love language be Faithful!  It's where it all begins or else there's no love language at all.

So get out there and dance with the one who brought you to the dance, love him/her unconditionally and let's show the world out there that being faithful to your spouse is the way to go!

Blessings,
ALicia Roark

Let's talk about the "S" word! A call to Purity!

First of all, I can't believe I'm writing about this, but it is important in any marriage! When God puts two people together He meant for them to be faithful to each other.  Genesis 2:24 says: "For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh." NASB.

You might be asking what does this have to do with The 5 Love Languages?  Hold on a little longer, I'm going somewhere with this!  My love language is Physical Touch.  You see, sexual purity is EVERYTHING to me. So, during the week, in order to get Sean to speak my love language I feel it very necessary to do my part.  What do I mean?!!!  When it comes to sexual intimacy, I first have to be cognizant of what I read, watch, listen to.  I am Sean Kevin Roark's wife and if I want him to speak my love language, I have no business listening to music that talks about committing adultery, reading magazines that lend themselves to cheating on him, and I don't put myself in situations that would put our love life/marriage in danger.  I NEVER go ANYWHERE with a guy alone.  If I'm out with a male, I meet that person in an open public space and let my husband know what time, place and how long I will be with that person and even invite him to come along and/or pass by.  My marriage vows and marriage bed are precious to me.

Guess what oh reader of this blog?!!  If you're a Christian woman this also applies to you!  The music you listen to, the material you read, the places you go and people you associate with are in direct correlation to either helping or harming your marriage.  What are you reading?  What are you listening to?  Where are you going?  Satan knows exactly where to attack you.  So, be on guard.

Another thing that I really find important is that whatever your love language is, do things to improve it.  For example, since we're talking about sex and sexual purity in marriage (I'm SO BEET RED right now!) if your love language is physical touch, there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with dressing a little sexier for your spouse.  I mean, you did do everything in your power to keep him when you dated right?!!!  Romance is NOT dead!  Strike up some romance!  Dress sexier, wear his favorite perfume, flirt with him and go out there and be a woman who makes and keeps her man happy and her marriage bed clean!

Lovingly Sean's,
Alicia Roark

For the Ladies!!!! Romance is NOT dead!

Hello Ladies!  It's been a while since I've posted about our journey.  Today is for all of you ladies out there who are married!

Remember when you first saw your husband?!!!  You know that feeling you got when you first kissed, or when He first told you that He loved you?!!  Yeah!  That was a wonderful feeling!  Even thinking about my first kiss with Sean still makes me grin from ear to ear and gives me goose bumps!  

Well, ladies although it's primarily the men who try to be romantic towards us, why not try to be romantic towards Him?!!!  Stop and think, when is the last time you went out of your way to show your spouse that you loved him and appreciated him in a romantic way.  Now, we all know that our precious men have one subject on their mind, and that's one way to strike up romance.  However, there are other ways!  

What about if you:

1.  Wore his favorite perfume

2.  Made him his favorite meal

3. Wrote him an encouraging note and left it in his lunch box

4.  Sent him on a scavenger hunt throughout the city!  (Trust me!  THIS IS FUN!)  

5.  Wrote I love you in lipstick on the mirror!  

6.  Wore a cute little sexy outfit that made him go wow when he saw you!

7.  Give him a coupon for a romantic evening alone

If you're a Christian lady, why not leave him an encouraging scripture in his lunch box or on his car seat!   You see, as Sean's wife I firmly believe Romance is a two way street! My favorite author whose forte is Godly Romance is Debra White Smith.  She's my hero when it comes to Romance!  I use her book "Romancing your Husband."  Let me tell ya girls, use that book and your man will be impressed! Trust me!  http://www.debrawhitesmith.com/ 

So, ladies!  I challenge you today to turn up the Romance and and see what happens when you speak His love language!

Lovingly Sean's,

Alicia Roark

Acts of Service...His love language!

As Sean and I journey on through this 5 Love Languages adventure, there's one thing that I never tire of:  The beam in his eye when I speak His love language!  Those beautiful blue eyes light up, he smiles from ear to ear and my heart just melts!  He appreciates the fact that I am going the extra mile and even getting creative while speaking His love language!

Acts of service for a love language can be tiring some days!  It requires creativity, sacrifice, and getting up early to get some things done.  I wouldn't trade it for the world though!

What if your spouses love language isn't acts of service but it's something else?!  Well, that's great!  I would like to challenge you to get creative in speaking their love language!  You might be surprised at what God does next!

So here are a few tips for each love language!

1.  Words of Affirmation:  http://ebonny.hubpages.com/hub/Words-of-Affirmations-Examples-Love-Language

2.  Acts of Service:  Clean the bathroom or cook their favorite meal and bring to him/her.

3.  Receiving Gifts:  http://trueagape.net/2012/09/5-love-languages-receiving-gift-ideas/#sthash.W7Y6bMqj.dpbs.

4.  Quality Time:  http://trueagape.net/2012/09/5-love-languages-quality-time/#sthash.hnbsWOcs.dpbs

5.  Physical Touch:  This one isn't hard!  A hug, a kiss, a gentle touch!  Slow dancing under candle light with romantic  music in the background; massages....:)  Can you tell this is my love language?!!! LOL!

I challenge you to get creative and journey along with Sean and I as we speak each other's love language!

Lovingly Sean's,
Alicia Roark

Rekindle the Flame of Love! FOR THE MEN!!!!!

Alright! Today's blog is aimed at the men!  I'm sure a majority of my readers if not all are ladies.  So ladies, invite some of your men to read this and gain some insight!

Hello to all of you men brave enough to read this!  You're reading this because a female/lady thought enough of you to send you here!  My name is ALicia and my husband Sean and I are doing 1 year of the 5 love languages.  http://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/.  I would like to invite all of you men to take the 5 love languages quiz.  I know, it's not really very manly, but it will do things for your marriage/relationship with your wife or girlfriend.  Find out what your love language is!  I double dog dare you!  Afterwards ask your wife or girlfriend to find out what her love language is. Then start speaking her love language.

Is your marriage in a strain?!!!  Is it distant?  Has the flame of love been extinguished?  Well, let me tell you from a wife who thought her marriage was great, you can ignite a fire so bright that it can't be put out.  Last Summer my husband and I did the 5 love languages for 90 days. OH MY!  God did great and mighty things in our marriage!  SO much so  that we've decided to embark on this for an entire year.

Today I would like to challenge all of you men to do one thing:  Do something for her that she doesn't expect!  If you don't have any money, it's ok.  Here are some great tips!

*Write her a note to tell her how much you love her.  Yes, I just asked you to write her a quick love note.
* Cook dinner for her
*Do her least favorite chore for her without being asked.
*Run her bath water for her (I condone this for married people ONLY)!
*Say something encouraging to her!

For all of you married men out there here are just a few tips for you!  I know God made you guys to procreate so you think about sex early and often throughout the day!  (I am now beet red!)....Hang on guys, I'm going somewhere with this.  Here are some tips for you:

MARRIED MEN ONLY

*Wear her favorite cologne!
*Candlelight dinner
*A single red rose...send it to her at work
*Send her on a scavenger hunt throughout the house..you are the prize at the end!  (SO RED Right now!)
*Encourage her!  Yes, say something positive for her
*Flirt with her!  Ask her on a date! Get creative! You married her...so ask her out!!!!!  She might be shocked!
*watch the movie Fireproof together!  It's good!  Seriously, go rent it guys!

Alright guys!  Have fun and thank you for taking the time to read this blog!  God bless your day!

Lovingly Sean's,
Alicia Roark

Getting Creative! Love Languages Challenge! For the Ladies!!!!!

Doing this 5 Love Languages journey for one year causes one to get creative! Ladies, this blog is particularly aimed at you!  My sweet Sean's love language is Act of Service!  He loves a clean, sparkly house!  He becomes a new man altogether when the house is sparkly clean!

Sometimes I have to get creative when speaking his love language to keep it new and exciting! Well, here are some things I'm have done in the past:

1.  On his dinner plate, Leave a love note.  Nothing long
2.  Leave a Scripture on his pillow
3.  Send him on a scavenger hunt in the house....prizes may vary!
4.  Message back and feet!

Here are some other things I'm going to be doing:

1.  Dropping off a card for him at work!
2.  Making him a surprise candlelight dinner
3.  Getting a room one night..just because!
4.  Baking his fav dessert
5.  Picking up something he is running low on
6.  Back and foot message by ME!

Speaking your spouses love language is fun and exciting.  Get creative!  If you have other ideas.  Please chime in!  God bless you!

Love in Christ,
Alicia

Love is Patient! Day 2!

This love languages journey is fun!  Is it always going to be fun?  Probably not because it will require sacrifice on both of our parts.  We'll have days where we get on each others nerves, but those will be few and far between in comparison to the good days!  It's hard for Sean to let go and let me do the things such as prep his lunch just the way he likes it.  However, we're working on that..Baby steps.  1 Corinthians 13:4 says, "Love is patient, love is kind...."  During this journey we will both be excercising lots of patience with the other person as we adjust to our new way of doing things!  Patience, it doesn't come easy but it's worth it!

Just a few moments ago I was cutting up a couple of stalks of celery when Sean walked in.  I said, "Honey, I'm cutting you up two stalks of celery today incase you get hungry early and need a snack."  He said, "Now I have a stalker!"  Yep, my silly husband!  He's like that 7 days a week!  What you see on Sunday is what you get the rest of the week! There's no pretending with him.

I got to thinking though about what he said.  We as Christians have a daily stalker and his name is Satan.  1 Peter 5:8 says:  "Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour."  http://biblehub.com/1_peter/5-8.htm.  So we must always be on the alert for Satan and his schemes.  There's nothing that would delight satan more than for Sean and I to give up early on in this game.  Guess what?  We aren't!  

So today, if you're journeying with us, I'd like to encourage you to encourage your spouse today!  Do at least one thing that speaks his/her love language!  Be careful! Satan is out there too stalking around us.  

Agape,

Alicia